Why It’s Important To Take Time For Self Care As A Mother & Some Tips On How To Do It
Self care is important for everyone; but for some, self care is easier to make time for than others. And sometimes the importance of taking time for self care is completely forgotten due to other “more important” responsibilities.
This is what happened to me when I became a mother, my kids’ well being seemed way more important than my own. And when I did have some free time, I tried to spend it taking care of other people. My parents, my husband, my in-laws, or whoever else I thought I could help.
But it wasn’t healthy to completely neglect myself, and I’ve only recently started to realize that. So I wanted to write this post today to remind other moms that are feeling how I did that taking care of yourself doesn’t become less important when you have kids, quite the opposite actually!
But why exactly is self care important as a mom?
The answer to this question could get really long winded, but I’ll try to keep it straight to the point.
It becomes harder and harder to take care of your family the way you want to if you’re “burning the candle at both ends” as my dad used to say.
So although it might seem like taking time for yourself means you’re putting yourself above your family, it couldn’t be further from the truth. By spending some time taking care of yourself, you’re doing something that will benefit your loved ones in several different ways as well.
The first way is that you’ll be the best version of yourself when interacting with them; which means you’ll be less likely to snap at them, more likely to engage in bonding activities, and be more productive when you’re completing the daily tasks that all moms need to do.
But the second way, which is the one that I want you to remember, is that everyone who loves you will be happier if you’re happier. Those who love you want you to take care of yourself!
And don’t forget that you’re a person too. You’re not just a mom, daughter, or wife. You’re a person! And you deserve to treat yourself like one.
I do realize though, that sometimes it can be hard to make the time for self care…
Whether you’re a stay at home mom or you have a job outside of the home, moms have a lot of responsibilities. And I know from firsthand experience that taking time for yourself can be easier said than done. So if a lack of time for yourself is the main reason why you’re not partaking in self care, then here are some tips.
Reevaluate the household chores. Depending on a lot of things (such as the age of your kids and how many people live in your home), consider delegating some household duties if you can. And furthermore, if there are any household chores that you can complete less often then try to do that. For instance, if you mop the floors every day; could you mop them every other day?
Find some helpful mealtime hacks that work for you. Every family’s diet is a bit different, but if there’s a way to spend less time cooking then it could free up some time for you. One popular method is to start making slow cooker meals. But two others that I’ve used in the past are to find meals that leave you with leftovers that can be used the next day; or alternatively, to freeze meals and warm them back up as needed.
Wake up earlier or stay up later than your kids. This step might be harder to complete if you have a baby, but if your kids have a pretty consistent sleep schedule then you could try to adjust your sleep schedule around them. If you’re an early bird then try to find an hour for yourself before your kids wake up, or if you’re a night owl then you could stay up after your kids go to bed. I tended to do both when my kids were young.
Become allies with some fellow moms! Chances are, you’re not the only mom in your area that could use a break from time to time. So if you’re friends with another mom that you know you can trust then make a deal for each of you to host playdates on a regular basis. That way each of you gets the space you need.
Find some activities that your kids can’t resist. Is there a movie that always intrigues your kids? Is there a video game that they enjoy but don’t always get to play? Or for younger kids, is there a special box of toys that they can only play with occasionally? If so then you can use these special activities to keep your kids busy while you take some time for yourself, and if not, then you should try to find something your kids will enjoy and take this method into consideration.
One other option is to hire some help. Obviously this won’t be possible for everyone due to a variety of reasons, the largest of which is money. But if the option is available, then hiring some help could give you the time you need. It could come in the form of some weekly help with the housework, a trusted babysitter, etc.
Hopefully out of the tips I’ve listed here, you’re able to use one or more of them to clear out some time in your schedule. And if you have, then we can move onto the next section which is…
How do I best use my new found free time?
Here are 5 great ways to get started on your journey to self care.
Journaling –
The act of journaling isn’t for everyone, but for some people it can be very therapeutic and perhaps even help them reconnect with their past selves. So if you think it’s something that you’d be interested in at all, then consider buying yourself something to write in and begin to jot down your thoughts when you’re alone.
Another benefit that’s more specific to moms is that if you journal regularly then you can preserve memories and specific feelings from when your kids were young that you may have forgotten otherwise. It’s a way to keep track of small but meaningful moments.
Exercise –
I know that exercising might not be the fun activity that you want to do in your alone time, but it is one of the most important things you can do for your body. You’ll be much healthier and feel better if you exercise at least a few times a week. And you can choose a workout that suits you the best; yoga, jogging, there are a lot of options!
Plus, I know that a lot of moms struggle with body image. Particularly if you’re a new mom, but this problem can be present in a mom of every age. So working out could help you combat that, as you’ll probably be able to see as well as feel the benefits of the exercises you’re doing.
Take A Nap –
This idea is pretty much the opposite of the one I just mentioned, but the simple act of taking a nap shouldn’t be underestimated. If your kids are a little older and you get all the sleep you need, then by all means don’t take a nap unless you simply want to.
But if you’re the parent to younger children that have more unpredictable sleep patterns, then a bit of extra sleep could make a big difference.
Meditation –
Meditating can provide you with mental and physical benefits, whether or not you’re a mom. But it may be an even more important exercise for moms to do, since being a parent introduces levels of stress and anxiety that you probably haven’t experienced before.
Meditation can calm you, help with depression, and improve mental wellbeing. And all of those benefits have an effect on your physical health as well. Additionally, meditation isn’t hard to do and there are a lot of videos and articles online to help if you do need a little extra information.
Connect With People You Haven’t Seen In A While –
Motherhood can be isolating in some ways, and limit the amount of time we have to spend with loved ones in our lives that aren’t our children. You might begin to call friends less frequently, skip previously planned meetups with family, etc.
So if you find yourself with some extra time, it can be really refreshing to meet up with some friends or family members that you haven’t been able to catch up with in a while. This can bring you out of your shell a bit and maybe even contribute to you feeling more like yourself.
And if you can leave the house, like if you have someone that can babysit, then maybe meet up with people outside of the home. Go shopping, out to eat, etc. Something as simple as getting out of the house can make a big difference in your attitude, and it’s a great way to combine two different self-care methods.
I hope this post has inspired you to take some more time for yourself!
As I’ve always said, even if I can only inspire one mom with this blog then it’s still worth it. I genuinely want to make a difference in a few mom’s lives, no matter how small.
And self care for moms is one of the topics that I’m most passionate about because I wish someone would’ve told me to take more time for myself when my girls were young. So this post was a must-write for me, and I thank you for reading it! And if you have any comments then please feel free to leave them below. I love hearing from other moms.